The World Of T

Care to have lunch with me?????????

2009-06-09T14:21:00.002-05:00

"Lucy" ( as SOME of my friends like to refer to me ) had an experience today that she would like to share ( as I told one of my lunch mates...."You know those lists of things you're supposed to do before you die?? We can check this one off" 0_0 ).

I went to NOODLES today for a quick lunch ( I was out and about running errands etc ). The place was packed and I didn't realize that until AFTER I ordered my food and tried to find a table. Finally, a 4 seater became available and I was seated. I looked up at a mother and her 12 year old daughter and said " I don't mind if you want to join me " and the Mom ( who I came to know as "Sarah" ) said " you really don't mind?" And I assured her I did not. Meanwhile, an older woman at a booth said " I feel funny having this booth all to myself. In New York, you just sit wherever there's an opening " . Sarah turned to her and said " Why don't you join us too?" ( Now...either Sarah was being nice or she thought there was safety in numbers should I turn out to be a serial killer enjoying a penne rosa pasta dish at Noodles )> So...."Anita" ( originally from Manhattan 30 years ago ) joined us.

I had an hour lunch with people I've never met before and probably won't again - it was delightful.

I bet some of you would have done this too - or ...already have.

No longer a little girl......

2009-05-19T10:48:00.004-05:00

Our oldest went to her first Prom - she's no longer a "little girl" in many ways yet she has so much to learn.

Have we done a good job? Will she remember what we've taught her? Will she always come to us when she needs us??

This parenting gig is tough but it has many rewards. I look at her and see the young lady I never was at her age. So smart....so beautiful....so poised.....so GOOD.

Take a moment and listen to the lyrics of this song ( don't peek at who sang it just yet ) and then reflect on your own lives as parents.

I Just Want To Take A Bath By Myself....Please!

2009-04-30T21:42:00.002-05:00

I love to soak in a tub at night - I don't do it every night but often enough that I could qualify for being an amphibian.

Tonight - I had the various aches and pains from the day and I wanted to relax. Normally, I wait until everyone is in bed because it's quiet then and I'm less likely to be disturbed.....

However, I stepped into my pool of serenity ( aka hot bath in an old white tub ) earlier than usual. That, was my first mistake.

I'm in the tub relaxing when Jenna BARGES in ( yes...I say BARGE ). "Mom, I need to have you copy off my "ZINE" for me " The Zine is Jenna's magazine she writes for her classmates ( that's a whole other blog peeps )...... I patiently reply " Your Dad can help you with that"

Jenna responds " No Mom, he doesn't know how to copy front and back like you do"

Once again....I patiently reply " Jenna, he has a master's degree and he is an engineer -- he CAN do this"

We go round and round for a while when I finally say "Why are you still here...go ask Dad!! " ( ok...losing some patience now )....

The Cherub replies "Oh...I'm pooping"

0_0

"You're what????????"

Jenna says " I'm pooping "

Me " and why are you doing it here??"

Jenna " where else would I do it?"

Me "oh I dunno....maybe IN ONE OF THE FOUR OTHER BATHROOMS in this house!!"

Jenna chuckles and says " but then I couldn't talk to you"

Me " for heavens sakes how long does it take you to poop!?!"

Jenna " Oh I'm done...I'm just wiping really well so my butt won't itch later"

SIGH

Can't a person even take a bath without being interrupted by a pooping child???

Geeeez.... you try to raise good kids.....

2009-04-23T16:18:00.002-05:00

I'm talking to Jenna this afternoon and say " Tianna's mom needs someone to give Tianna a ride to Girl Scouts tonight - I think I'll call her and offer to do that "

** Tianna has high functioning autism

Jenna groans " do we hhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaave to?"

Me " I think it would be the nice thing to do "

Jenna "let's not "

Me " Jenna, it's not Tianna's fault that she obsesses on topics and that she doesn't know how to behave in social situations. I would think that YOU above all people would get that "

Jenna " Why?"

Me " Because of Mark. In any case, I still expect you to be compassionate and understanding "

And what did my angel say???

Jenna " well...I'm not"

Nice...real nice. I'm raising Ted Bundy.

Bon Journo Jackie....

2009-04-15T07:53:00.001-05:00

Jackie - it was unbelievable!! If I had your email address, I would email you a link so you could see the album.

I think we all should be Italian!!

Oh ya baby.....

2009-03-17T14:01:00.004-05:00

WHOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!! It's finally spring like weather here!! Slushy muddy streets....pot holes everywhere....

I'm in a frantic panic mode trying to prepare for Italy but dang it....it's nice out and tempting me to go play!!

I might as well be walking on the sun......

Oh ya....

Just A Yearly Review - A Reflection

2009-03-13T13:19:00.002-05:00

Isn't he handsome?? *Huge sigh*

We had a yearly review this week at the county offices with Mark's social worker ( Janeen - he's had her since he was 2 ), her supervisor ( TW ) and Mark's guardian ad litum ( aka never seen her before in my life and she was questionable in her ability to keep things straight ).

TW welcomed me and I had to look at her for a minute and say " Oh...I remember you! You were at our house 5 or so years ago to observe Mark "

She laughed and said " Yes ...that was me and that's when I knew your family needed help and relief " 0_0

I said " was it that bad?? "

TW " Ummm yes. It was very bad and you had a daughter that wasn't speaking due to the stress in the home "

Me " It's good for me to hear feedback because I have days where I wonder if I was just being a wimp or that I was throwing the towel in too soon. I'll always wonder if we did the right thing "

TW " There is no question in my mind that Mark is where he needs to be and I see lots of cases. You were wiped out emotionally and you had other children to think of ....not to mention your marriage "

0_0

I write all this merely to reflect on it - it was almost SOOTHING to hear her words. I hadn't seen her since the day she came into my home to assess whether Mark really needed to be placed. And ...as I recall, she watched Mark for 30 minutes in our home and turned to Brook and I and said " what can *I* do for you?? What can I do to get the ball rolling on placement? "

Folks - some days I have wondered if I was just a wimp but it's very nice to occasionally get feedback that confirms we did the right thing.

God bless all families that face tough decisions....and God bless good social workers and their supervisors.

When Did I Turn Into A Detective??

2009-02-27T12:20:00.003-06:00

Look at her.... all angelic....all innocent....all holy looking....

DO NOT BE FOOLED!!

This child has had a horrible cold all week. The problem is that with this particular child, it's hard to tell just how sick she really is because she has become quite the capable actress. Meryl Streep has nothing on Jenna.

Example of conversation this morning ( this was after I told her she WAS going back to school ):

Jenna ( insert sickly and weak voice here ): "I'm really really sick Mom "

Mom ( insert responsible and caring Mom voice...not ) : "Go eat something so I can give you some medicine - I don't like to give it on an empty stomach "

Jenna ( answering way too quickly ) " I already ate something "

Mom ( raising eyebrow ) "Oh?? What did you have? "

Jenna (slightly raising her eyebrow ) "why do you want to know? "

Mom ( suddenly turning into Nancy Drew ) "So....if I were to go downstairs and look in the sink...would I find an empty cereal bowl? "

Jenna ...squirming and looking like a deer caught in the headlights.

Mom " Get downstairs....eat some breakfast....NOW! "

Motherhood is not for wusses.

A Book Review.....

2009-02-17T17:30:00.002-06:00

Book Synopsis:

The novel is set in the American Northwest. The main character is Mackenzie Philips, a father of five, called "Mack" by his family and friends.
Four years prior to the main events of the story, Mack takes his three children on a camping trip to Multnomah Falls and Wallowa Lake near Joseph, Oregon. Two of his children are playing in a canoe when it flips and almost drowns Mack's son. Mack is able to save his son by leaving his youngest daughter Missy alone at their campsite. After Mack returns, he sees that Missy is missing. The police are called, and the family discovers that Missy has been abducted and murdered by a serial killer known as the "Little Ladykiller". The police find an abandoned shack in the woods where Missy was taken, but her body is never found. Mack's life sinks into what he calls The Great Sadness.
At the beginning of the book, Mack receives a note in his mailbox from "Papa", saying that he would like to meet with Mack on that coming weekend at the shack. Mack is puzzled by the note - he has no relationship with his abusive father, who left when Mack was young. He suspects that the note may be from God, who his wife Nan refers to as "Papa".
Mack leaves his family and goes alone to the shack, unsure of what he will see there. He arrives and finds nothing, but as he is leaving the shack and its surroundings are supernaturally transformed into a lush and inviting scene. He enters the shack and encounters manifestations of the three persons of the Trinity. God the Father takes the form of an African American woman who calls herself Papa, Jesus Christ is a Mideastern carpenter, and the Holy Spirit is personified as an Asian woman named Sarayu.

My Review:

I really....really....really wanted to LOVE this book. It's right up my alley and it's a subject matter that intrigues me. That said, there were many parts of this book that just didn't resonate with me. I like the idea of having "GOD" be both male and female. That worked well in my opinion. However, the 3 persons in one God thing....well, since we know that the church didn't come up with that idea until the council of Nicea....I kept struggling with that as being "FACT" in this book. On the other hand, I kept smacking myself and telling myself to read it as a story and not get caught up on specifics.

There is so very much to LOVE about the book - I like the idea of forgiveness - even for those that do HORRIBLE things. I like the idea of God always being around us.....I like the idea that heaven is really unimagineable to us......

I just wish I had loved this book more.....SIGH.

I'm tossing my hat in the ring!!!

2009-02-05T12:36:00.002-06:00

I'm entering Mama's BEST LOVE SONG PLAY LIST competition!! I have a feeling that most of the songs I've selected Mama has never heard of - this might hurt me in the competition....I must add I am prepared to poop in her purse should I be penalized for it!

Shhhhhhhhhh I'm pretending....

2009-01-27T17:52:00.004-06:00

I'm pretending it's summer and I'm driving down the highway with my windows down -- radio loud as can be. Playing good ole rock and roll.

I also have no body parts that sag and I am smoking hot. Jackie has nothing on me in her cool red car because mine is shinier and has no ice or snow on it. It also goes faster and no cops can catch me.

Don't shatter my fantasy.

This is dedicated to "MAMA AND THE FLORIDIANS"

2009-01-14T13:37:00.004-06:00

Let me educate you on how you know when it's REALLY cold out:

1. As you drive around town, you notice as your tires turn on the snow covered pavement they make a moaning sound. Sort of like a low rumbling thunder sound. It's as if your car axle had bones and they were creaking.

2. Your tires feel like Fred Flinstones as you bounce down the road. It's like they're square instead of round.

3. Ever heard of Black Ice??? It's not a rare and valuable diamond. Black ice occurs when it is SO COLD OUT, that your exhaust from your car freezes to the highway. You can't see it and if you drive up on it suddenly, you're likely to go spinning like a break dancer.

4. Speaking of spinning....do you know how to get your car out of a spin?? If your car start spinning to the right, do you know what to do?? You give into it. A mistake new drivers make is to jerk the steering wheel in the other direction.....this makes for spinning that can go on for days.

5. Creep up to a stop sign - don't come full speed and then slam on your brakes unless you want to slide into the intersection. New drivers ( and my husband ) often make this mistake 0_0. You can wind up rear-ending someone as well.

6. You know it's cold out when zero degrees sounds all right to you. As long as your nose hairs don't freeze and your forehead doesn't hurt, it's bikini weather to you.

7. It's not the cold....it's the WIND CHILL STUPID. Enough said on that.

8. People with pets tell me that they have to CARRY their pets outside for them to do their business. Dogs aren't stupid and they look at you like " are you flocking crazy??? I'm not going out there!! My pee will freeze in mid air "

9. You know it's cold out when people write into the paper and give suggestions on how to "enjoy" the weather. 2 gems from today's edition: 1. Blow bubbles outside and watch them freeze in mid air. 2. Boil water in the microwave and then toss outside and watch it freeze in mid-air and create snow. Obviously, here in Minnesota, we live on the edge and know how to have a good time.

10. You know it's cold when you're automatic windows don't work on your vehicle. OR, you forget how cold it is and go to use them and they snap out of position.

11. Never wash your car when it's uber cold out - unless you don't mind having it permanently sealed until Spring ( which comes in July in Minnesota ).

12. You know it's cold where you live when you start to befriend people over the internet that live in Florida. You secretly keep the idea of crashing their place if you go insane.

13. You know it's cold out when the automatic doors at Target or Cub stop working and you have to actually PULL A DOOR OPEN.

14. You know it's cold out when you decide that HELL is not a fire filled place but it's in International Falls, Minnesota instead.

15. You know it's cold out when the sight of your running furnace turns you on.

16. You know it's cold out when you refuse to go out and get the mail.

17. Speaking of the mail, you know you live in a cold climate when your metal neighborhood mailbox(es) break off because of too much exposure to salt. Thankfully, one of your pack-rat neighbors has an old table he lifts it up onto until the USPS can replace the darn thing in the Spring ( which is in July.....).

18. You know you live in a cold climate if you know what BAG BALM is. 0_0

19. You live where it's cold if your garage can be used as the largest indoor freezer in the world.

20. You live where it's colder than snot if your garage floor looks like the bottom of a sewage dump. No sense sweeping out til July because you'd be at it daily. It's wet, muddly, sludgey gunk.

21. You know it's dang cold out when your car tries to slap you for starting it.

22. You know it's cold and yucky out when everyone looks like the younger brother from A CHRISTMAS STORY - all bundled up ....looking like space men.

23. You know it's winter when your green van looks white from all the salting on the roads. You accidentally rub up against it with your BLACK COAT ( naturally ) only to look like a bag lady.

24. You know you live in a cold climate when you decide that the color theme in your house will be in warm colors ONLY. Rich earthen and southwestern colors and hues are used in a sad attempt to at least give the illusion that it's not that cold out.

25. You know it's cold out when the steel handles on the store door fronts hurt to touch.

Oh heck....I suppose I could go on and on but now I feel like I need a hot bath.

WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Jenna's Family :)

2009-01-06T14:13:00.004-06:00

Jenna wrote this ....made it into a book...and gave it to us for Christmas:

The most important thing about my mom is that she's humorous.

It is true, Mom is unselfish. She cleans my messy room. Also, she's gentle. She helps me fall asleep sometimes. She is calm. One time she calmed me at the doctor's office. But the most important thing about Mom is that she's humorous 0_0

The most important thing about Mark is that he is very successful.

It is true , Mark is smart. Mark is autistic and can cook, mow the lawn and put puzzles together. Also, he is funny! Mark does really funny things. One time, he was baking cookies and he turned the turning thing on full blast.

But the most important thing about Mark is that he is very successful.

The most important thing about Rachel is that she is my friend.

It is true, Rachel is helpful. Sometimes she helps me with my homework. Also, she is a dreamer. She dreams up some pretty cool things. And yes, she is brave. One time Rachel opened a package when we thought it was a bomb ( it wasn't and we are still here ).

But the most important thing about Rachel is that she is my friend.

The most important thing about Dad is that he is bold.

It is true, Dad is brave. He killed a spider that creeped me out! Also, he is proud. When he does something right he is proud. And he's honest, he told me the truth when he put my cookies back in the oven and burnt them.

But the most important thing about Dad is that he is bold.

The most important thing about me is that I'm totally awesome!!

It is true, I am crazy. I send e-mails that don't make sense to my friends. Also, I'm funny! I can make anybody laugh out loud. Last, but not least, I 'm cool. All my friends think I am!

But, the most important thing about me is that I am totally awesome!

What Happens When You Get Sick Over Christmas????

2008-12-27T21:25:00.001-06:00

ACHOO!!!

My family flew out to New Mexico yesterday.....alas...I was too sick to fly. I was in bed most of the day on the 25th. Just a bad cold mon....bad cold!!

I am flying out to NM tomorrow on a later flight. I feel better but my right ear is plugged. It can't be as bad as labor right?? I know landing will be tough but I will buck it up...

Merry ACHOO Christmas!!

Oh Man - I LOVE Me A Man With A Snow Plow

2008-12-08T19:24:00.004-06:00

Some women love furs.....some love jewels....some love dollar bills.....GIVE ME A MAN WITH A SNOW PLOW!!!

Jag is outta town and I was just out trying to scrape off the half foot of snow ( yes ...gorgeous and fluffy. I always like it until December 26th and then it must go! ) when I hear " Hang on Theresa!! I'm coming!! " and like a knight on a noble stead he came!! My hero!! TIM!! He has a plow on the front of a riding mower. I am having evil thoughts while my husband is away...... I can be bought with hasty snow removal services.

Anniversary Time

2008-11-24T09:23:00.004-06:00

I'm biologically related to 3 people in that photo above - now you know where I got some of my more "interesting" features 0_0

Tomorrow, Jag and I will have been married 19 years. I really adore the guy - not only am I in love with him, I happen to like and enjoy him.

We went to a Fraser fund raiser Saturday night ( a wonderful center in our area that helps special needs kids; autistic folks in particular. Mark went there for 5 years ).

As you might imagine, it's an evening full of an array of emotions for us. It brings up memories for us that are mostly wonderful but some are painful. We get to run into old friends and take a stroll down memory lane ( we ran into our former A.S.S. members...... folks that we used to hang out with once a month so our autistic kids could be with other families that didn't freak out over someone banging their head against a wall. Oh...and btw, A.S.S. stands for Autistic Social Society -- naturally, I coined our title after a margarita or 2. We've also been known to burn a book or two ).

One father got up and gave a talk on how it was to raise his special needs son -- he read the HOLLAND poem which brought the house down. He then read it again and applied it to his own life with his son and he couldn't get through it - the man was reduced to tears. Not a dry eye in the place.

Later - the director of Fraser took the stage and asked everyone to stand that knew someone with autism ( there were probably 800 people there )....3/4 of the room stood up. Amazing actually. She said ( and I may have mucked this up a bit ) that every 20 minutes, 12 children are diagnosed with autism. It's at an epidemic rate in this country - yet funding is down for research and programs.

What does this have to do with Jag and me and our Anniversary??? I'm so very thankful to be married to someone who has my back on this journey and who quietly grabs my hand at galas like this to remind me he is with me and cherishes me.

Below - is a copy of HOLLAND:

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Why I haven't been posting....

2008-11-16T11:09:00.002-06:00

It's been a rough week folks.

Our good friend Paul died rather suddenly Tuesday morning from complications of ALS. While we all knew he would eventually pass from this horrible disease, his death came sooner than we all imagined. He had just started to lose muscle control in his neck and face. He hadn't yet made the decision on whether to be put on a trach or not.

Early Tuesday morning - he wanted to use the bathroom. His wife and adult daughter were in the process of helping him when he went into distress. They were unable to tell what he was trying to communicate to them ( he had lost the ability to speak a year ago ) and he suffocated in front of them. Very tragic.

Then....Friday night, my brother called to tell me my 102 year old Grandma had died.

We're a bit emotionally spent here at the moment. But never fear....I will be back and post you some meaningless but sort of cute stories.

Jackie - I think you are my biggest fan :)

Teacher's Pet?? You decide....

2008-10-20T12:35:00.002-05:00

Jag and I went to Jen's parent teacher conference last week. You never really know what to expect at these things but in general....they run about the same. They show you the stuff your child does well in and the stuff they need to work on etc.

We arrive and the teacher looks at us and says " Can I just say what a lovely young lady you have there " 0_0

How did Jag and I respond?? With hysterical laughter. I'm sure most of you will agree that we did not have the most appropriate response at that moment but it was honest ( had this teacher, who appeared capable and alert, mistaken our child with someone else?? ).

It only got better from there --- Mrs. Anderson ( there has to be a million teachers in Minnesota with that name ) says " When Jenna speaks, you just have to listen. She's so profound and she's really a thinker " 0_0

Jag and I supressed giggles and tried to take the rest of the conference in with seriousness and with the respect it deserved.

Apparently, our child is a genius in math but sucks at spelling ( just in case you were curious how she was doing besides being the teacher's pet ).

No teacher ever adored me - not one stinking one.

Jackie - can I be your pet?

My Child - The Rebel

2008-10-09T23:05:00.004-05:00

You know...I try...I REALLY try to be a good mother and set a good example. Don't look at me like that!! I really do!! I set limits....I set boundaries... I have consequences for inappropriate behavior....I talk about strong and inspiring women to our girls....which brings me to the topic of this thread.

I was in charge of the Girl Scout meeting tonight for Jen's troop ( of course, 3 other Moms were helping but for some reason I was sort of cast as the leader of the "pack" - again, I ask that you NOT look at me like that!! I swear I did not try to control the whole thing.....ok maybe I did a smidge but they all wanted to talk about the approaching election at the planning meeting and it was MOI that kept them on task.......oh now I see doubt written on your face just as my husband had when I told him this story but I swear on my favorite jeans....it's true. ).....anyway...our topic was on being a healthy person inside and out and having positive female role models. One assignment I gave the girls ( 14 of them ) was to name women they consider to be role models in their own lives and then come to the meeting and share this 0_0

As we went around the room....hearing "my Mom"....."my Grandma"...."Madame Currie" ( no one really said that but pretend they did because it will make the story funnier )....."My teacher".....Maya Angelou ( again...work with me here ).....and we get to MY CHERUB.....can you guess?? Can you guess who my child's role model is??? I had no idea before this meeting......Come on ...take a guess......

Give up??

My child said PINK 0_0 I am choosing to see this is a good thing. It is isn't it?? Please tell me it is!!! Pink has a potty mouth but she's a strong woman right????

Aye yie yie.

Later in the meeting, we had the girls write positive statements about each girl. Can you guess what every girl said about my cherub??? Here's an example:

1. You're funny

2. You have a sence of hammer ( spelling is not a virtue in Girl Scouts ).

3. You make me laugh

4. You're the funniest girl in the world

At that last one, I looked at the author ( Abbey) and said " in the Whoooooooooole world?? Not just the USA?? Not just Minnesota?? But...the whhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooole world?" Abbey assured me this was true.

Obviously....Jag's genes are at play here.

Mistaken Identity 0_0

2008-10-04T18:32:00.004-05:00

I'm not even sure if this will make sense ...but here goes.

Apparently, there is another Mark's Mom in the twin cities area. I know this because I occasionally get her phone calls. A year ago, I even got a call from her doctor giving her ( me ) her test results and they weren't good ( cancer ). I had to explain that he had the wrong number yadda yadda.

Fast forward to TODAY....in my mailbox is a card addressed to Mark's Mom and some dude's name. I was puzzled...opened it and it read:

Mark's Mom and Joel:

We found out about the challenges you both are facing with cancer last weekend - very sorry to learn about them. You are both on our minds and we wish you favorable (can't read word )

-Michele and Ron

0_0

Oh mannnnnnn....someone sent a nice card to someone thinking the person got it and they didn't get it - now what? I looked at the return address -- nice...their last name was like SMITH but not SMITH. SIGH.

I did an internet search and found them though!! I called and said " hi, my name is Mark's Mom but I'm not the Mark's mom you are looking for. Yadda yadda just thought you'd want to know that I got the card by mistake "

What's it mean Jackie?? Is there another me in a parallel universe?????

Isn't that an odd story???

Ramblings

2008-10-02T15:16:00.002-05:00

God Love Ya!!

Mama and I have decided that Joe Biden is the best comedy act going in this year's election - but no one knows about it!!

Now....let me be clear....I'm a diehard Dem and I genuinely LIKE Biden but he makes some major gaffes that send me into hysterics. For example, he was giving a speech and told a man in a wheel chair to "STAND UP"....when he realized what he had done he said " Oh God Love Ya " ( it KILLS me everytime I see it ). Go to youtube and type in JOE BIDEN and wheelchair if you're interested.

I firmly believe Biden is a smart man and knows what he's talking about most of the time...but he makes some major funny gaffes. To be honest...I identify with him and, I am a female Joe Biden ( sans the balding head and the different bits and pieces ).

I will be watching the debate tonight hoping that Joe doesn't gaffe too much....He can save those moments for the road.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jenna is going through the sacrament of RECONCILIATION in our church ( it used to be called CONFESSION in my day ). Basically, the sacrament involves reflecting on your life and "sins" ( errors etc ) you have made and how you seek to reconcile yourself with God and your fellow human beings.

We attended a workshop last weekend on this and Jenna naturally is full of questions. They had a handout that showed children standing in line waiting to have their " reconciliation " with the priest....my cherub said " Can't I just phone it in??"

0_0

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jenna has to have a mole removed and she is behaving as if she is having an arm amputated. She is referring to it as her upcoming "surgery". I've told her to knock it off and buck it up but the appeal to use this for drama is too dang tempting for her. She actually wondered why I couldn't just remove it at home for her - ummmm NO.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mark turns 14 Saturday - whooooooooohoooooooo. His birthday used to be bittersweet for me. On the one hand, we're thrilled he is growing up and proud as heck to have him as our child. On the other hand, birthdays used to mean "yet another year Mark is still autistic ". However, I seem to have moved past that. I'm totally pumped for his birthday and totally cool with the autism thing. In fact, I think I shall convert. Yall can just cater to me from now on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Those are my ramblings for now - if I think of anything else sorta ....semi....kinda interesting, I'll post.

Life in the slow lane....

2008-09-27T08:25:00.003-05:00

My friends....I think I'm going through changes in my life 0_0. I'm 47 and I am noticing changes in my moods and in ahhem...other things. Awww heck..... I think I'm just at the starting gate with a new and exciting? path in my life. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Major....Major...Major cool thing happened at our house last night. Hopefully, yall will get the significance of this event..... Mark was home last night and in an awesome mood. He got some ice cream out of our larger freezer. It was like a brick and he was trying his best to dip some out in a bowl. He touched my shoulder and said "Help peese" . THIS IS HUGE!! It's the first spontaneous, non-prompted sentence he has ever said to me. He got high fives for that one!!

~~~~~~~~

Some of you heard this one already but Jenna had a good one the other night. Rachel came home asking for 70 bucks for Vivace ( no...that's not Versaci for the middle class - it's a choral group ). Rachel, hates to ask for money and acts guilty as if she's sending us into the poor house. Jenna pipes up " Rachel always asks for money...she's a liability ". 0_0

~~~~~~~

Rachel is going to Homecoming with a group of friends this year and has no date. I think that's swell btw. Last night, she went to a party at her friend's house....she came home and said "Mom, all of these girls were hugging Sam and Josh ( good friends of her's ) and I sort of like Sam but I didn't do that. I just didn't feel like doing that - was I right?" ....Yes Baby, you did the right thing. No huggin on boys and not sending mixed messages works for me.

~~~~~~~~

Jenna wants to start her own religion. I can really not see an effective argument of why she shouldn't do this. Although....I can see her angling it for a way to get donations.

That's about it from life in the slow lane. Grandma is sleeping most of her days away but that's not a bad way to go out. Mark broke a window on a bus a week ago with his head but....we got through it and the bus driver seemed cool. Windows are over - rated.

The Rollercoaster

2008-09-11T14:33:00.003-05:00

Ever have times in your life that feel like you're on the emotional roller coaster at the "What Doesn't Kill Ya Only Makes Ya Stronger" amusement park??

Most of us take this ride while others sit on the sidelines and never lose their lunch or have their head spin.

I just walked in from an emotional lunch with a friend whose husband is dying from ALS...only to get 2 phone calls; 1. My son needs stitches because he banged his head on a window and 2. My 102 year old Grandmother ( a woman that exemplifies strength to me in so many ways ) is dying. Toss in a few previous worries about various friends over their health and stresses and I'm a weeping cocktail.

Life has a way of smacking you up aside the head and showing you what the real issues in life are doesn't it??

Be back later - phone again.

Mom....I've got something to tell you and I don't know if you're gonna like it..... 0_0

2008-09-02T15:12:00.005-05:00

Those words were uttered by my 10 year old 2 nights ago. I knew she was too young to be pregnant ( unless she was from Arkansas ) but I braced myself anyway.....

Marksmomm says " ok - what is it?"

Jenna " Well, I think I'm too old to have you lay with me at night. From now on.... I think I should put myself to bed"

0_0

Jenna " How do you feel about that?? Are you going to be ok? "

*weep*

My baby is not a baby - can I rent one of Mama's???

It's a comin'..............

2008-08-17T19:47:00.002-05:00

The crickets have been chirping during the day......the locusts are starting to sing....the grasshoppers are starting to act all wonky......my mums are already starting to bloom......

Fall is coming. Which, in and of itself, is a beautiful thing ....but.....right behind fall comes.......

WINTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sob city!!

Well Alrighty Then..... 0_0

2008-08-08T22:00:00.002-05:00

I'll just post this and let yall react:

Matthew McConaughey says the birth of his son will help bring a little joy to others in the world someday. The actor kept the placenta from the July birth of his son and plans to plant it in an orchard, he tells CNN's "House Call with Dr. Sanjay Gupta" in interview scheduled to air in two parts Aug. 9 and Aug 16.

McConaughey says he hopes it will fertilize the land, a ritual long followed in several cultures.
"It's going to be in the orchards and it's going to bear some wonderful fruit," he says, according to an interview transcript.

Ok then.....

Sometimes......Life is not all that interesting

2008-08-06T21:11:00.003-05:00

*Twiddles thumbs*

Ummm my life is not really interesting this week. I vacuumed....I dusted....I did laundry..... I killed a spider..... I showered ( it had been a week after all ).....I cooked....I ran a child to soccer.... I yakked with other soccer moms.... I hid my shock when a mom said she didn't want her daughter going to another child's bday party because she thought the child was "weird" ( I told her Jenna was going because we would not contribute to a kid being sad because no one showed up ).....I got in over my head on a message board debate over gun control ( I've decided that I'm wrong and we all should be packing heat. The next time someone cuts me off in traffic *BANG* right in the front tires .......I over ate.....I did not work out.... I didn't read a book ( despite about 20 waiting on my book shelves for me to read )..... I listened to my neighbors discuss yet another unplanned pregnancy with one of our neighbor's son's and his gf..... I saw a homeless man and felt badly for him.....I scheduled Mark for a neuro appt and for allergy testing .....I've had insomnia for the past 2 nights due to hormones ( further proof that God is indeed a man and has a sick sense of humor.)....I ordered my Step Mother In Law a birthday gift because I knew my husband wouldn't want to and wouldn't get around to it...... I sent both girls to their rooms for being monsters.....I refused to let Rachel drive all over town ( and I found out I'm the strictest mom in town...COOL! ).....I had someone tell me I didn't look 47 ( that felt good because I could tell she meant it. I needed to hear that on that particular day ).....I balanced my checkbook and realized that I was a bit too generous over the past 2 weeks 0_0....I watched PROJECT RUNWAY with my girls ( and because I know Mama likes it.... I watched just to see Tim Gunn say MAKE IT WORK )....I had a call from a friend on vacation on her way to buy liquor 0_0........
Basically....I have writer's block *weep*

You Never Know When You're Going To Jump In Someone's Story

2008-08-02T12:52:00.005-05:00

I want to preface ( is that the word? ) this story by saying that.... I love people. I love hearing their stories and...I love to spend time people watching - I'm never bored that way. Some people collect precious moments figurines...I like to think I collect "precious moments"

The STORY:

Jenna and I accompanied Rachel to her second driving test. I have to admit I was nervous as heck because I didn't want to have to go through the drama of her NOT getting it. On the way there, a "red bird" flew in front of our car ( Jag's family calls cardinals "RED BIRDS" because that's what his late mother called them. Whenever we see one, we think of Grandma ). I figured it was a very good omen for us to "see" Grandma that am.

Rachel took the test and passed!! WHOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!! She was on top of the world. As we stood in line, she was spilling over with excitement, to which I made the comment " Rachel, your excitement is spilling over on the other people in line"

An elderly couple in front of us turned to share their lives with us for a moment. The woman was GORGEOUS. She looked to be in her 60's. Gorgeous skin and just a warmth to her personality. She was the size of my late Grandma Genny ( about 4 ft 9 in if that ) and had the same sweetness. The woman says to Rachel in a strong East coast accent " I flunked the first time!! I didn't drive until after I had three kids and the funny thing is that he ( she jabs her husband ) was in the car business~!"

Now I don't know if these 2 were Jewish or Italian but their accents were right out of a tv sitcom and I adored them immediately.

Mr. Elderly turns and looks at Rachel and says " she's gorgeous!! How old is she??"

"16" I say.

Mr Elderly says " she'll be married in 2 years " 0_0

Mrs. Elderly jabs him and says " nooooooo they go to college now and all that stuff"

I turn to her and say "speaking of gorgeous, you are!! You caught my eye immediately when we got in line "

Mrs says " I'm 85"

Me - "get out!! No way!! What is your secret!?"

Mrs "soap and water - that's all I've ever used "

Folks - she was a beautiful woman - inside and out.

Mr pipes up and says " you know you can get them to pass you on these driving tests if you slip them a 50" ROFL!!!

He then goes on about how beautiful Jenna is.

I tell him " well they look like their Dad "

Those 2 were straight out of WHEN HARRY MET SALLY ( remember at the end of the movie where the older couples share their stories??? )

~~~~~~~

I'm sure I didn't do that "precious moment" justice but it was a fun blimp on the radar of life. You never know when life is gonna toss you a party....even in line at the DMV ( btw, those people working there have NO sense of humor ...just sayin! )

Jackie can sooooooooo boss me!!

2008-08-02T11:40:00.003-05:00

Jackie yells jump and I respond " HOW HIGH!!". Did you at least read the shaved eyebrow story?? My kid is obsessed with shaving.

I DO have a story for you ( it happened with our oldest got her license the other day. ) Stay tuned!!

Jag is a naughty boy!!

2008-07-26T16:18:00.002-05:00

This is what happens when your husband grabs your bum during phototaking ..........he is DTM

Oh yes she did!!!

2008-07-20T11:21:00.003-05:00

Our youngest SHAVED off her eyebrows. OH YES SHE DID!!! She tried to tell me she had plucked them ( why she did this... I dunno!! Someone told her she had bushy eyebrows and the genius in her said " SHAVE THEM OFF " ).

She now looks like she's going through chemo therapy.

Did I give her empathy and provide gentle support through all this?? HECK NO!! I told her that the next time she felt like shaving something off 0_0 ....she needed to speak to me first.

I'm thinking if we put a turbin on her head and have her sit on the corner with a tin cup, we could make a few bucks.

FINALLY!! A Family Picture!!

2008-07-18T22:08:00.002-05:00

I've been wanting a family group picture but...alas...autistic kids hate to have their picture taken. However, I figured we had a "shot" at the Group Home picnic with all the outside help to get Mark focused and "sat down".

We had a photographer there as well ( a friend of Kevin's -- Kev is the group manager ). The above shot was taken with Jag's digital by a staff person at the picnic.

I'm tickled pink to have all of us in a photo!!!

You aren't ANYBODY until you have someone stalking you on the net!!

2008-07-09T09:45:00.005-05:00

That's right folks. I have my own bunny boiler internet stalker. "She" claims to be a "she" but my gut thinks "she" is really a repressed homosexual guy that has a mother fixation. My stalker can't go 2 posts without a gay reference ( or a sexual one ).

Many of us posted on "her" board until we figured out she was a nutter ( yes....I'm slow on the uptake ). I have no idea why she became obsessed with me but..... "she" did ( lucky me!! ).

I generally ignore the posts she makes on other boards because I don't want to engage her on any level.

She has posted on BPPP with at least 2 additional names - the IP numbers didn't match but ....the nutters are always smarter than the sane ones on how to get around that.

I'm leaving for a few days tomorrow - good time to get out a town mon!

Jackie... you KILL me!!!

2008-07-07T15:25:00.003-05:00

Jackie - Sadly, I cannot amuse you today. I have come to ask YOUR advice. My baby failed her driving test by 4 points today ( who knew you need to stop at a red light before you turn right 0_0 ).....and who the monkey needs to know how to do a 90 degree back in parking job???

The child is feeling dejected and sadly.... I sort of felt she would fail. *SIGH*.....not because she's not capable but because (1) she had called and told all her friends she was taking the road test ( big mistake in my book - the heavens like to monkey with you when you are sure of something ) and (2.) she was a nervous wreck. It was like she was going for a root canal or something.

My urge is to have her out driving as soon as possible again.....sort of like the GET BACK ON THE HORSE idea??

Any feedback??

P.S. Funny, I always felt Mama was put on earth to entertain me!! She needs to post a new entry on her blog!!

Save me... I want to live!!

2008-06-28T22:43:00.003-05:00

That's me in the background with the almost 16 year old driving. Maybe we look alike to you - we like to wear matching shirts and have matching contusions on our skulls 0_0.

I had the "almost 16 year old" drive me up to St. Paul today via a busy-ish hwy. 0_0.

Dear Lord.... I think I ripped off 2 finger nails with the white knuckling I was doing.

On the one hand, she does PRETTY well ....if she was in the over 80 age group that is.

She takes SUPER wide turns and does them rather.....fast. My stomach is somewhere near Snelling Ave in St. Paul.

And on the other hand....well there is no "other hand" - it's just nerve racking and it's every bit as scarey as you can imagine except worse!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I don't know if I will survive this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On an un-related note... "THE PET" ( as we refer to my SIL ) has moved out. We called her the pet because she reminded us of a cat except she didn't stink and she didn't lick her bits and pieces. She was OUR PET for 8 months. It's with mixed feelings with say good bye to her and wish her the best in her new uber cool house.

There's no place like home....

2008-06-25T12:05:00.004-05:00

The oldest urchin is HOME SICK. To quote her " I miss travelling with you guys and...would you believe I'm the only one that picks up after myself??? "

Oh yes, CHILD UNO ( the one that told me she was living in a prison 2 weeks ago ) has decided that Aunty Em and Uncle Henry are not so bad.

For starters, she is the one sharing a bed with her friend's little sister since her pal wants a bed all to herself ( you have no idea the karma here and how much I had to bite my tongue ). For another thing...there are 5 people in a hotel room; and 4 towels. Her pal used one for her hair and another to dry off....leaving 2 towels for 4 people. Rach was appalled.

I haven't heard so many " I love you's " or "I miss you's" since Jag and I were first together :)

This was the best thing we could have done for ourselves as parents - send your kids away so they can see you're not WICKED!!

The 10 Year Old Is My Homey This Week....

2008-06-24T21:22:00.006-05:00

Jag is off on a Business Trip.....SIL ( aka Gail according to Drama ) is in and out ....and the "Almost 16 year old" is in Georgia....that leaves Jen and I to be each other's homies.

So last night I'm watching a show where a Mom gives birth to SIX babies - it was amazing.....I just had to watch it. Jen joined me. She then asks me " so do they have to do it 6 times to get 6 babies?" 0_0 Aye yie yie.

I then explained the wonders of FERTILITY DRUGS to her. She then wondered about people that choose NOT to have babies and we discussed that for a while.

Then...my cherub said something profound and beautiful....she said " well, I think you should have a baby since your body goes to all the trouble to DEVELOP ( her word ) a space for you to have a baby...it would be a shame for it to go to waste " Naturally, my genius offspring was referring to the Uterus and how it should not go to waste.

Sniff and ROFL!!

Ok ...so I asked the 10 yr old...

2008-06-19T11:53:00.005-05:00

.... do you want to help me dust? ( Yes oh wise mothers, I realized my mistake the minute the "question" left my mouth ). She replies " nope - I only help with cooking " 0_0. I say back " so...whaddya gonna do when you grow up and you have a messy house? " She, without missing a beat says "I'll have a husband " 0_0 Foolishly, I ask " what does that have to do with it??" She says " Simple - I'll cook and he'll clean"

Now...why didn't I think of that???

The Parenting Gig

2008-06-16T22:43:00.005-05:00

Let me just say that our youngest offspring has started her summer vacation out on shakey ground with me. For starters, she informed me last Friday that we had a boring house. Thank you very much cherished child but no one asked you.

Then last night, she told me that *I* was lazy because I didn't go upstairs and get her trash for the weekly garbage collection 0_0. Oh my friends....it was uggggggggggggggglee here after that. I informed my FORMER cherished child that she was going to shadow me the entire next day and do everything I did. *For a moment I saw fear in her eyes but then she quickly squelched it and said " FINE ".

So today....I got her up bright and early. Cherub says " Why are you getting me up so early!! It's summer vacation "....Mommie Dearest replies " I'm up so you're gonna be too "

Her first job was to REMAKE her bed after the first attempt stunk. Then, she was escorted down to the laundry room to sort laundry ( this brought out a " ewwwwwwwwwwwwww " and I quickly reminded her that a good percentage of the dirty laundry in the basket belonged to her and had hugged her body and special bits and pieces. 0_0. )

Then it was back upstairs to clean out the dishwasher.....after I noticed a few upside down spoons and knives in the fork slots....I decided a firm reminder of what would happen if the jobs weren't done correctly was in order.

Cherub promptly gave me a Harumpf! and said "I'm a lazy person and when I grow up...I'm gonna be a boss "

Aye yie yie....Jag and I have our work cut out for us. We've given birth to a deadbeat Dad.

*********

I see politics in her future.

I'm Slow On The Uptake.....

2008-06-16T09:39:00.004-05:00

You ever have one of those "A HA!! " moments where you realize you've been an idiot. Oh...the signs are all there but you've been missing them and your brain seems to be on a vacation?? People around you must think you've either become incredibly insensitive or you're just an idiot....or both.

I woke up this morning with clarity my friends. I've been in a fog for the past 2 weeks. My brain started a vacation without me and it finally returned this morning. My first thought was "Oh my - I've been missing the boat!!". Naturally, I had feelings of embarrassment coupled with thousands of DUH's running through my head.

Do you ever have moments like that where you realize you've been a dunce?? If so, please share. Come join my dunce party.

P.S. Drama - remember the wav. "You are an idiot"?? Please play that when you think of me :)

Someone explain this to me...

2008-06-12T14:52:00.003-05:00

I don't get it - how does an A student come home on the last day of school with ONE SHOE???? And when you ask said child where the shoe is...the response?? " I dunno. Must have fallen out of my backpack. It's ok though...I was done with them anyway " 0_0

Also - type in TENNIS SHOE on your search thingie and hit images....tell me why there are a few photos of nude women tossed in. I don't get that.

Pray People

2008-06-11T07:36:00.005-05:00

The above pictures were taken in my home town. My folks have been without a phone and gas power. It's raining in the midwest and it's showing no signs of stopping.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This has been a week of personal events for my family - such is life.

Mark was at the ER last night for a split chin - he banged his head on the floor until it broke open. *SIGH*

But what I came here to ask folks is to pray hard for my Aunt and the people of Cedar Falls Iowa. My Aunt was evacuated last night from her home. I just heard minutes ago that the levy broke. Homes can be replaced I suppose but this particular Aunt has more than her share of hardships.

Send positive energy her way guys.

June Is The Month For Brides

2008-06-09T15:43:00.002-05:00

Happy Birthday

2008-06-04T14:43:00.006-05:00

Grandma and Jenna

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today's Grandma Genny's birthday. She loved family gatherings and she was especially fond of birthdays. I am picturing her in heaven having a huge meal and instructing St. Peter to " finish that up " and tossing another helping of taters on his plate. There was no such thing as DIETS in her world nor did plaque build up or clogged veins touch her radar screen. If it tasted good....eat it...and then eat some more. Any problem you had or any difficult situation could be solved by a slice or 2 of pie.

Happy Birthday Grandma!!

Random Thoughts

2008-05-28T22:02:00.006-05:00

I must be in a quirky mood because I've been ravaged by random thoughts lately - none of which are important in the whole scheme of things. Yet, my mind is in a state of unrest....

For instance..... today, as I was driving by the local antiques auction place, I thought " I bet folks, like me , that grew up in old farm houses and USED some of that stuff they're selling aren't big buyers of that junk " ( YES I said JUNK. Oh I suppose it's got some value to someone and I've been known to pick up my fair share of junk along the way but most of my friends that are gung ho over antiques grew up in nicer ( ahhem...maybe newer is the better word ) than I did. I have friends that decorate their entire homes in someone's old stuff that got sold when they died off in the 1930's. So ends thought number 1.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thought #2 - I don't watch soap operas. Not even night time ones. I can't even get interested in them. Then it dawned on me.... my interest in those type of shows died when my own life became a drama circus. ( Message boards don't count because you get to participate IN the dramas ). I don't really like most reality shows either so....I'm not sure what to make of myself. End of thought #2.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thought #3 - Do you ever notice that the older you get, the more stuff gets caught in your teeth?? Is that because we're eating more sticky stuff or because our teeth are moving and getting all crooked again? 0_0 It's just not cool to be smiling at someone and come home and see you have a hunk of brocoli in between the incisors.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thought #4 - Is it fair to still get acne in your 40's?? This seems like a MAJOR design flaw to me. Either that, or it's a damned cruel joke. Does one opt for the anti-wrinkle cream or the clearsil?? These are important issues for humanity to ponder.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thought # 5 - As weight goes UP...why do things sag DOWNWARD?? An oxymoron in my mind. Yet...another design flaw.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thought # 6 - Where I live, I've noticed that if it's 100 degrees out, no one cares if they have to park gazillion spaces away from the entrance of a store. However, if it's 50 below zero, we all fight for the closest spot. I guess the fear of having your nose drop off or your eyelids freezing shut as you run into the store for a gallon of milk is a different story altogether.

*******************

As you can see, I've had a lot on my mind. I'm sure I'll have more important issues to ponder as the week goes on....and I'll be sure to keep you all posted.......

In the meantime.... visualize JUMBO SHRIMP in your mind.

Time Marches On....

2008-05-20T16:51:00.004-05:00

Where does the time go?? When do our babies grow up?? It hardly seems fair that you're wiping their bums one minute and the next handing them the car keys.....

Yesterday....the last of our children left single digits and ...entered double digit agedom. Yes...the baby turned 10. It's too late to go out and get another one and ....besides...they're not like puppies *sniff*....

So...the "baby" says to me.... I want to shave my legs 0_0. I tried to hold her off as long as I could because....well...let's face it...once you start, you're a slave to it for the rest of your life unless you join a granola cult.

My neighbor took an ethical stance and felt a child should be much older. I looked at this neighbor who gave me unsolicited advice and said " ethics aside, my child is hairy. Think HIRSUTE here. Think ELECTROLYSIS poster child.

So... I bought the "baby" a razor and watched her prance off to shave her legs.....all the while I'm thinking " you poor pathetic sucker... in a year ...you'll be griping "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Oldest child has made a huge decision....one I am having bittersweet feelings over. Oldest child has decided NOT go to out for Soccer this summer and fall and focus on academics instead 0_0.

She has played soccer for 10 years *weep* Her position has mainly been goalie and I have LOVED watching her play it over the years. But alas...those days are over.

Jag and I told her it was her decision and told her we were fine either way.

On an up note...I won't have to do any fund raising or go to anymore Booster club meetings. Yahoo! But on the other hand... I sure will miss watching my child kick that ball downfield.

The Dog Race Of Life

2008-05-19T16:09:00.004-05:00

So.....the new neighbors 2 houses down have a dog the size of a football ( as in....it would be easy to kick the thing for 50 yards ). Anyhoo....I see this dog in the street and try to shoo it back on the lawn. I mosey on up to the front door of the neighbor's house....door wide open etc ( screen door was attached *wink* )....no answer to my doorbell. *SIGH*. So I get Cujo jr and I put him in the fenced yard ( I was soooooooooo doing my best Dog Whisperer on this cream puff ).

~~~~~

5 minutes later...Cujo is in MY yard. I yell for Jenna to entertain him because....well...she's always wanted a dog. She went to play with him and that mutt started running in circles like a mad cow. I swear this dog has ADD.

Jen could not catch him and she was not enjoying the dog....I yelled to her " you wanted a dog...now you're seeing how much fun they are ".....Then I have an 0_0 moment " what if that dog lays some "batteries" in my yard that "I" have to pick up!?!?" It was time for drastic measures.....

~~~~

Jen and I cornered ole Yellar in the corner of our yard and I picked the bugger up - he had the nerve to snip and yap at me. Too bad fur ball...you're outta here!!

Then I took him and locked him out of our yard. I turned to Jen and said " we tried to save his life but if he becomes roadkill....it's not on us" 0_0

FLOCKING DOGS!!

Endora is Stalking Me!!

2008-05-17T08:19:00.003-05:00

Linche - it's obvious you are stalking me. You show up on the BPPP board and now on my blog. Don't you have a Dunkin Donuts employee to harass? Don't you have a basket to make? Don't you have a Clay Aiken fan club meeting to go to??

If you don't stop your stalking...I shall be forced to call the FBI...or worse yet...Kahlik.

The Curly Shuffle

2008-05-14T19:04:00.003-05:00

Hey Moe!! Hey Moe - yuk yuk yuk!!

SIL didn't get the job she wanted at the Science Museum. Therefore, I've decided to become a Stooge until she is employed.

Logical? Not at all but it made sense when I went to type this post.

Just because....

2008-05-13T09:48:00.002-05:00

SIL had a promising interview yesterday peeps!! They asked her back today to meet with HR!!

Meanwhile...I'm dreaming of Italy!!!

Remembering cont.

2008-05-12T10:45:00.004-05:00

Just Thought Of You Today

2008-05-12T10:38:00.003-05:00

I miss your lap :)

I know who the terrorists are!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-05-09T10:38:00.007-05:00

Ohhhhh don't be fooled by those 2 in the picture!!! I have no idea who they are but.....they're terrorists and they're a threat to our national security!!! Osama is clever my friend!! Verrrrrrrrrrrrrrry clever!!

After travelling in 2 different airports over the past weekend, I came to realize that anyone over 70 is a possible terrorist. Consistently, anyone over 70 is pulled over and wanded, frisked, patted down and made to do the hula hoop while gargling a gold fish without swallowing it.

Those innocent looking, yet deadly folks, were consistently pulled out of checkpoint lines. WANDED!!! Patted down!!! FRISKED!!! Suddenly, my father didn't seem so innocent and fun loving when the 22 year old security agent ( I have jeans older than this kid ) was frisking and patting my Dad down. It was a Brokeback Mountain moment for sure. He and my father did enjoy a camel afterwards though.

My Mother claims to have artificial knees - they had to be wanded too. My Dad claims to have a pace maker and a defibulator ( I don't even know how to spell it - but I'm sure it's deadly if used on innocent people ).

THEN it dawned on me....every elderly person was being wanded. It's a conspiracy!! They're out to get us all!! Those canes and walkers could harbor weapons!!!

Blue haired people be damned!!

Reunions

2008-05-08T09:10:00.006-05:00

Some of you know, I flew out to Washington state last Friday; accompanying my aging parents on a visit to my brother and his wife...and to attend the college graduation of my beloved niece, Jordan.

I was dreading this trip more than you can imagine. My brother drives me insane and I specifically was not looking forward to staying at his house.

There's a long history there which I need not bore you folks with but suffice it to say....we go together like Bush and McCain ( well...at least how they USED to go together 0_0 ).

So....off I flew with my parents to the great Northwest. I have to admit, I had a good time travelling with those 2 old birds. I was the designated driver so I got to boss them around ( sort of ironic when you think about it " We'll get there when we get there " 0_0 ...or " Didn't you JUST go the bathroom?? " ). At one point when I was parallel parking, I said "Could maybe one more person give me directions on how to do this because I'm thinking 2 is not enough" - My brother and Dad were telling me how to park and I was doing a fine job by myself tyvm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We stayed in a Super 8 motel Friday night in Spokane ( my mother booked it and didn't know it was a less than stellar place to stay -- I think the bath towel covered one cheek of my abundant yet cute arse ). I knew she felt badly so I just sort of joked about it " hey...it's not the Bates Hotel "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We then drove down to Pullman to Jordan's house for a pre-graduation reunion of sorts. I knew Jordan's mother, stepfather and 2 half siblings would be there and I was anxious about that. I hadn't seen "Jane" ( actually, that IS her real name ) for nearly 17 - 18 years. I had adored her when my brother was married to her and missed her over the years. As much as I had tried to connect with his second wife, she just wasn't "Jane" and I missed the talks we used to have. In addition, I had heard great things about her husband and was excited to finally meet him as well. Plus, the 2 children ( ages 7 and 3 ) would be fun for me to meet - I sort of enjoy kids 0_0

I found myself being a big nervous as I walked into Jordan's house.....then I saw Jane. It was if time had not passed. We hugged each other and it was like a "reconnecting" had already begun. We chatted and exchanged stories about our lives etc. I met her wonderful husband ( loved him immediately ) and met their 2 children ( 2 of the sweetest and cutest kids I had ever met ).

Then my brother and his wife showed up - naturally, they were both impeccably dressed in the latest and coolest fashions. They looked great as usual. Hugs and greetings exchanged. Pictures taken of the graduate with both of her " families " ...then we prepared to head over to the graduation.

My niece, Jordan, suddenly was bossing everyone. "Papa and Grandma, you ride with my Dad after graduation and head down to Walla Walla. I'll ride with Tee ( her name for me ) and return my gown etc and then follow you down " Her mom, stepdad and sibs would come down later. I wondered about this arrangement but said "okey dokey "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We went to her graduation and after waving at the wrong young woman for 20 minutes we finally "found" Jordan and waved our silly arms off at her. ( side note - I didn't exactly think it was Jordan we were waving at for the first 20 min but I am sort of visually challenged and I figured my brother KNEW his kid better than I did 0_0 ).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the graduation ceremony was over, we went out into the sun and took more pictures and yacked some more. Finally, we loaded in our vehicles and prepared to make the trip down to Walla Walla.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As it turned out....Jordan and I had a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng talk on that nearly 2 hour drive. She talked about her future....about hoping to find love....and...about her feelings for her Dad ( ie him "abandoning" her as a child ). She told me she finally realized she was angry at him because she found herself sniping at him all the time. Apparently, they were at some gathering and she did something exceptionally well...to which he turned to a bystander and said " I must of raised her right " and she snapped " You didn't raise me " 0_0. I listened to this and let her share how she finally confronted him and how they came back together with a new understanding. As gently as I could, I said to her " I want to reaffirm to you that others saw what happened to you as a child and you have every right to have/had the feelings you do/did.....it broke my heart when your parents split up and I worried about you terribly ". She also shared how her Dad said his feelings had been hurt by her sniping at him. I then ( maybe I overstepped here ) said to her " the feelings of a 40+ adult ; one that has more tools and skills at coping...are different than the hurt feelings of a child "

We talked about many more things but I won't bore you with the details...only to say ...I felt I had recovered the closeness with my niece that I had felt with her when she was a child. She was...my first baby.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We arrive in Walla Walla and prepare for the "party" in honor of Jordan's graduation. My brother and his wife, naturally have a gorgeous house ( parts of it could be in a style magazine ). Everything appears as it should....yet...I never quite felt at home there. Maybe it was the sleekness of it or....the 2 giant great danes that roam the place 0_0. ( I did practice the Dog Whisperer on those 2 girls and they didn't mess with me. When I say " ride a dog save a cowboy " you get the drift on the size of those 2 dames ).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jane and crew arrived later. Folks....it was old home week for her and me ( at least it was for me ). We talked for hours ( kids coming and going....people walking in and out of our circle.... eating....etc ). She has become a natural healer of sorts and she reached over and told me " I see silver light shooting out all around you - it's quite fascinating to watch. I've never seen that color around someone before. It's like a star " 0_0. Now....she knows I am open-minded and receptive to this sort of stuff or she never would have said anything to me. So...we were off on another topic with her giving me a "mini" reading of sorts ( I'm still processing all that -- it's all good so...no worries folks. Just a lot of info to absorb ). The night went on and when it was time for her and her family to leave she said quietly to me " do you want to see God or feel God? " . 0_0 I had to think for a moment and I gave my first logical response that popped into my head " well, I am so visual...I want to see God "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning...I woke up and my first thought was " to feel God is to see God! " ....then I got it. It was like a lightbulb. I had been neglecting myself and my own spirituality for quite some time. I had some work to do and I was ready to do it. Also, I had a great deal of peace that morning. I also realized that a great deal of the anger I had been harboring at my brother was over the loss of Jane. I cannot completely describe how liberating that was to realize that. I had no idea how much I had missed her until I saw her again. I had been holding a grudge toward my brother and I had built a wall around myself against his second wife because she was not Jane ( my loyalty might have gotten in the way here ). It's odd but I found myself looking differently at those 2 the next day. Yes.... I still saw some of the pretentiousness and I saw the silly way they talked to their dogs but.... it no longer bothered me. I just went with it and lived in the NOW ( Jag and I toss that around at each other during stressful situations " LIVE IN THE NOW HONEY!! " )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I've rambled here but I hope you get the gist of how my weekend was. It was much better than I expected and.... I learned something along the way.

Yet another thing to hate...

2008-04-30T14:39:00.003-05:00

There HAS to be a man behind this!!

I live in the part of the country where they flush the fire hydrants and clean the streets in the spring. Well......... that leaves water in your toilet that looks like someone needs to add more WATER to their daily diet; water in your wash machine that looks like Apple Juice concentrate....yadda yadda.

The SAD thing is I waited 2 days to do my white laundry - my toilets looked better so I figured I was safe. I started the washer and tossed in Jag's white button down Ralph Lauren suit shirt and a few other WHITE articles of clothing....only to watch water the color of brewed tea enter the realm of my washer.

Somehow...somewhere... a man is behing this. I just know it!

What NOT to Wear.....

2008-04-27T11:39:00.003-05:00

Riddle me this oh wise souls....why do women over 45 - 50 think they can wear mini dresses?? Further, why do they think they can wear low cut ones with shimmery stuff all over them??

Girls....it was a wild night at the BALL - epecially if you were a correspondent for WHAT NOT TO WEAR. Holy moly - aye yie yie - do most folks not have a good perspective on how they appear to others??

I saw more sagging breasts and ancient thighs than I care to for the rest of my life. It was like a geriatric exotic dancer reunion for some of these women. Hand em a pole and watch them slide down it ( throwing a hip out in the process ).

0_0

Don't get me wrong - most folks know how to dress and carry themselves but those aren't the ones we want to discuss ...nor are those the ones we keep staring at with our jaw on the floor the whole night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Oh...and note to self - never bid on any silent auction items after a few glasses of champagne hastily gulped down....or you may be pleasantly surprised later.

I'm going to THE BALL...oh yes I surely am!!

2008-04-26T16:53:00.004-05:00

Oh yes kids....I'm going to a BALL tonight. It's for Jag's work ** groan **. It's at the Zoo for some fundraiser thingie.

I am just NOT ( did I mention NOT ) the "BALL" type. I'm more the Lucille Ball type. What does one wear to these things?? Luckily, it snowed last night ( oh yes, Minnesota spring is a riot ) so I can wear one of my winter dressy get-ups. Jag, naturally, bought a tux. Now...I'm thinking....why buy one when you can rent one?? But he looked at me like I was Lucille Ball. *shrug*

So kids...it's either have a root canal or go to THE BALL... I am voting for the BALL since I get free food and drink and the stinkin' dentist doesn't provide that.

Viva Italiano!!!!

2008-04-22T09:05:00.003-05:00

Ciao Mon!!

Our oldest is going on a choir trip in 2009 to Italy - whoooooooooohooooooooo!!!

Jag approached me last night about the both of us going along on what they call the "SHADOW TOUR" for parents ( in other words - we go to the same sites and cool places the kids do but we have no curfew -- I am picturing Jag and I frolicking in the Trevi Fountain or making out in the Pope's backyard - am I wrong to think such things?? )

I'm thinking that since I am Catholic, I should request an audience with the Pope and ask the important questions we've all been wondering.....

1. What do you wear under that robe - boxers or briefs??

2. What were you thinking by wearing those red shoe like things while on tour of the U.S.??

3. Who hears a Pope's confession??

4. Does the Vatican have a dart board with Martin Luther's picture on it in the game room??

As you can see, I've given these matters serious thought and I think it's time we all got answers!!

Ciao!!

Are we proud or what!?!?!?!?

2008-04-19T13:38:00.001-05:00

Rachel is lettering in academics!!! We are invited to a ceremony on the 29th!! Whoooooooooooohoooooooooooooo!!

Stay tuned!

Looking for Space......

2008-04-17T11:23:00.004-05:00

I've been a good sport....and my SIL has been a good houseguest.....but it's been 6 months now and I think it's time the universe bless her with a job :)

Don't get me wrong - in many ways it's been great having her here. I have a built in chef ( she is an excellent cook ) and someone to watch movies with etc. However, I can tell it's wearing on her to live here and frankly....it changes the dynamics of my family life as well.

I find myself being a bit miffed at Jag for no reason - I suppose it's because he's a safe person to dump this on. I also am keenly aware how he would be acting if this was MY sibling living with us 0_0

I am praying that her interview next week ( on the 23rd ) finally lands her a job. I know she REALLY wants this one and she has a good "in" because of a connection with Jag's job. Cross your fingers everyone!

Thank you for letting me vent :)

Bon Voyage Drama and Mama!! ( tee hee...that rhymed! )

2008-04-13T12:30:00.003-05:00

Bon Voyage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have a great vacation girls!! We'll miss you back here!!

Jag - The Continuing Saga of THE STOMACH TURNS

2008-04-11T09:18:00.004-05:00

Some of you know, Jag came home Holy Thursday with gut rot from work. Why is this significant? Well, in the 19 years I have known him, I think he's missed maybe 2 days from work due to being sick. The man never takes a day off unless it's a planned vacation....so....for him to come driving in the garage in the middle of the day, I knew he had to be sick.

We chalked it up to the intestinal flu or to food poisoning. *Shrug*

Until....he came home Wednesday with the same thing. The man is having some serious pain in his tummy. He did go to work yesterday and today but I see the Pepto Bismal bottle on my counter mocking me this morning ( which means he got up in the middle of the night and took a shot of it ).

He is mainly complaining of cramps that double him over.

I think it's time to see a doctor - any thoughts?

Mama Needs To Clean More....

2008-04-10T09:32:00.002-05:00

Mama has tagged me in her game of " quote the book "

The rules she posted:

The rules of the game go like so:
1. Pick up the nearest book (at least 123 pages long.)
2. Turn to page 123.
3. Find the 5th sentence.
4. Post the 5th sentence on your blog
5. Tag 5 friends to do the same!

My book is "The Speed of Light"

My sentence: "Did Mom ever teach you to count down into your sleep?"

On the message board, I tagged:

1. Gee
2. Eliza
3. BA
4. Sid
5. Birthmark

This is to mother you....

2008-04-04T13:25:00.005-05:00

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Disclaimer - the lyric " I will do what your mother didn't do " is not to imply anything against anyone's mother. Instead, I like to think of it more as " I will do what your mother can't or isn't able to do "..... I interpret this song more of a friendship song than a lover song.

Dedicated to all my friends:

This is to mother you

To comfort you and get you through

Through when your nights are lonely,

Through when your dreams are only blue,

This is to mother you.....

This is to be with you,

To hold you and kiss you too,

For when you need me I will do,

what your own mother did not do,

Which is to mother you....

All the pain you have known,

All the violence in your soul,

All the wrong things you have done,

I will take from you when I come....

All mistakes made in distress,

All your unhappiness I will take away

with my kiss, yes, I will give you

tenderness.

For child I am so glad that I found you,

Although, my arms have always been

around you,

Sweet bird, although you didn't see me,

I saw you....

And I am here to mother you -

To comfort you and get you through,

Through when your nights are lonely,

Through when your dreams are blue...

This is to mother you

Light a Candle

2008-04-03T09:36:00.006-05:00

Light a Candle - and send positive thoughts out into the universe today.

Mamamormon's Mama is in the hospital and she ( and her family ) can use all the positive energy we can muster up and send their way.

~~~~~~~~

In my religion's tradition, a lit candle symbolizes the special intentions we have in our heart and soul for someone else. It is a visual reminder that we are "concentrating", "focusing", or meditating about someone else or some issue. It need not be a blessed candle although I do buy special candles for this purpose ( check out the hispanic aisle of your grocery store ). I buy them because it helps me remind me that I am especially focusing on something other than trying to add a pleasant fragrance to my home :) Mama and Kahlik have razzed me a bit about my "candles" but they bring me comfort and keep my otherwise scattered brain focused on my special intentions.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Light your candles people!!

Waiting

2008-04-02T15:07:00.001-05:00

Friends,

Keep a special friend and her family in your thoughts/prayers.

~ T

"Once"

2008-03-23T23:05:00.005-05:00

We watched the movie ONCE tonight - the song playing comes from it. The music in this film is FABULOUS. The movie is worth watching for the music alone peeps!! Artists: Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova.

The film takes place in Ireland and it's really delightful to watch.

Listen and....

Enjoy!!

:)

Happy Easter!! Happy Spring!!

2008-03-22T11:41:00.003-05:00

As of last Thursday, most of our snow was finally gone....until Friday morning when we got hit with 5 inches of slushy snow.

*SIGH*

Thankfully, my butt will be on a plane Monday morning heading for 70+ degree weather.

Oh man - our kid is a con artist!!

2008-03-20T10:04:00.004-05:00

On Jen's report card ( I am NOT making this up!! ) it reads:

I really have enjoyed getting to know Jenna and having her in our classroom. She is respectful and a reserved ( reserved!?! ) student who quietly ( what? )models grade level expectations socially and academicially.

I'm sorry but that is NOT MY KID!!

We see NONE of that behavior at home. The child is a cross between Ellen DeGeneres, Robin Williams and Bill Clinton at home ( I did not have a relationship with that cookie that went missing ).

Jag and I rolled when we read that!! We could not read it without laughing!! Who's kid is this?

I told her " you'd make a great politician " 0_0 Was I wrong?

We interrupt this regularly scheduled blog...

2008-03-18T17:29:00.003-05:00

...to bring you a song dedication to my first "crush"

0_0

I was 5 and had limited tv exposure. I now see it was wrong to have Roy Love but it seemed right at the time.

Should we let friends boss us?

2008-03-17T09:20:00.003-05:00

I love my friends mon - I truly do. I consider them "sisters" I never had ( unless they're my male friends. Oh wait... some of my male friends are STILL like sisters but...alas...that's another blog ).

Occasionally, I allow them ( yes I said ALLOW ) them to boss me. One in particular loves to see how far she can push me out of my practicality zone ( as if I CHOSE to be born this way!! Would you expect a farm child to be anything different?? Don't I just fit in perfectly with the image???? I know, I know...another day, another blog ).

My "pushing out of the practicality zone" friend bossed me Saturday night into "tanning" before my approaching vacation. Now.... I haven't been to a tanning salon for nearly 25 years. AND IN THOSE DAYS, you went for a week before you got a tannish color (you never burned).

I sit here typing before you with it snowing outside and a sun burnt tummy and chest ( and upper thighs ). I blame no one but myself but who knew 10 minutes in a tanning bed ( I nearly laughed when the chick told me it would only be 10 minutes ) could make me a mascot for Red Lobster.

I signed up for 3 of these self basting "experiences" ....I think I'll wait a day or 2 before I go back for round 2

0_0

Ah, Ah, Ah, Beautiful Sunday!

2008-03-16T09:53:00.010-05:00

Anyone remember this song?? It makes me want to dance or roller blade....which is funny because I've never roller bladed 0_0

Songs are very nostalgic for me. When I hear an "oldie" it instantly takes me back to the time when I first heard it.

This one reminds me of Jr. High

P.S. Here are the lyrics and NO I did not know I was singing it incorrectly 0_0

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sunday morning, up with the lark

I think I'll take a walk in the park

Hey, hey, hey, it's a beautiful day

I've got someone waiting for me

And when I see her I know that she'll say

Hey, hey, hey, what a beautiful day

Hi, hi, hi, beautiful Sunday

This is my, my, my, beautiful day

When you said, said, said, said that you loved me

Oh my, my, my, it's a beautiful day

Birds are singing, you by my side

Lets take a car and go for a ride

Hey, hey, hey, it's a beautiful day

We'll drive on and follow the sun

Making Sunday go on and on

Hey, hey, hey, it's a beautiful day

Hi, hi, hi, beautiful Sunday

This is my, my, my, beautiful day

@_@ Holy Moly!

2008-03-13T17:01:00.001-05:00

Jag is outta town so it's girls night here.... so...we're ordering Papa John's pizza ( mainly cuz I've never had it before and I've heard it's pretty good. ).

DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOT ever google Papa John's promotional codes 0_0

Aye yie yie

I had naked photos and anti spyware warnings flashing at me everywhere.

And all I wanted was some pizza.

WHIMPER.

Shed the fleece and open the windows...it's 50 outside!!

2008-03-13T14:09:00.018-05:00

Oh dear friends it's sunny and "warm" outside. I have my windows open and I am butt dancing to songs on my computer as I type this. The snow IS MELTING!!

I ALMOST got my house to myself today ( something of which hasn't happened in months )...but alas...a child was at home sick today so I went to plan B. And, NO, B does NOT stand for BLOGGING. It stand for get some spring cleaning done.

*I cleaned out my pantry - a long overdue job and I now know I have tons of chipotle peppers and plenty of crushed tomatoes 0_0.

*A dear friend called me and we yakked for over an hour ( thank you dear friend - it was great to get caught up on your life and hear how your job was going etc. I am truly in awe of what you do and I am ever amazed at how you handle things. 500 thread count rating for you! ).

*I visited Mama's blog ( another dear friend ) and had fun on a post she made about old times. Thanks for that Ames!!

~~~

*A neighbor and dear friend called to ask me what passive aggressive meant 0_0 I finally figured out that she and her co-workers are going stir crazy and about ready to kill each other. I told her to either distance herself from them or go the other extreme and ....go out and get smashed together.

*My parents called me and had to tell me how "Dad made an ass ( Mom's words...not mine) at lunch today with his sister and her husband". One of Dad's baby sisters married an all around arse ( bigoted big mouth for short ) that has driven most of us nuts for years. He's the type that when you go out to dinner, looks at the waitress and says " I'll have a steak, potato and one of you" ....oh ya...that goes over REAL well with Iowa Farm boys that think their sister married a first rate jerk.

Anyway...this guy is JOE REPUBLICAN and thinks only democrats are crooks and cheaters. He started in on the governor from NY and how only dems cheat etc...... Dad sort of blew up and said " seems you guys prefer boys to cheat on your wives with...if I was gonna cheat, it'd be with a woman at least"....Ok the argument he used was lame and full of a few flaws *ahhem* 0_0 but it's not about the gov in NY; it's about dear ole Uncle Fran finally getting someone whipping it back at him. My brother chastized Dad about not talking about religion or politics ( T.y. for sharing Veronica now put your head down - there's no place for Ghandism or NICENESS here tyvm )....I asked Dad " do you feel better after letting him have it?" Oh yes indeedy he did. Then it's a good thing :)

I told Dad he did not make an ass outta himself and re-affirmed that Fran was an idiot.

I like to do good things for others :)

I don't understand some school policies....

2008-03-12T14:38:00.003-05:00

Mark has done well after his surgery folks. He has not attempted to pick at the stitches at all today. He even ate a bit of mac and cheese at noon!!! He's still swollen but he is healing.

After work, I stopped by Mark's school to sign a permission form for the school nurse giving her permission to give Mark his antibiotic and Ibuprofen when he returns to school tomorrow. She THEN informs me that he cannot attend school tomorrow IF he has had vicoden in the past 24 hours ( "because it's a level 3 medication" 0_0 ). Now...being the smart ass that I am, I really really really wanted to say " ummm if I was to U/A the all the adult staff here at Med Nazi Junior High, I'm betting I would find some level 3 meds hmmmmmm ".

Kev feels Mark should have at least one more day of the LEVEL THREE med so....Mark will not be returning to school tomorrow. I really have to wonder if that would even be asked or considered if Mark was NT.

Maybe I'm just tired....beyotchy....and have pms....or all 3.

DR. HOUSE

2008-03-08T09:58:00.011-06:00

Those of you that know me well, know that I love the show HOUSE. It's beyond entertaining...it's an experience. I have seen most of the episodes but there's been a few I've missed along the way.

Gwen has wanted me to see LINE IN THE SAND from season 3 for a long time now and we just never got around to it. It's about a boy with autism.

She rented it yesterday and had Jag and I watch it. WOW!! Jag and I have seen tons of shows/movies on autism but this one came the closest to depicting our lives. Mark is more communicative and has better eye contact than the boy in the show but otherwise, it's dead on. One scene in particular had Jag and I stop and look at each other with our jaws on the floor ( It involved Dr. Foreman wanting the boy to go for a test and the parents explaining " just let him get to level 1 on this game then he'll be ready" ).

Another scene that caused us to nod in agreement is when Dr. House explains to his team " these parents have lived with him for 10 years and watched and observed him. They have rarely brought him into the doctor and now they are saying his scream sounds differently. We need to figure out what's wrong with him" ( I'm paraphrasing but basically his team is saying it's a waste of time to examine the boy - that the only thing wrong with him is his autism ).

It's well worth renting and I urge all of you to check it out:

House
Season #3
Disc #1
Lines in The Sand

Pleased As Punch and Proud As A Peacock!!

2008-03-07T11:06:00.002-06:00

** Edited to correct Malapropism

Rachel has worked her arse off this trimester to raise her grades. Last trimester, she got around a 3.5 GPA which left her just OFF the A honor roll. Her goal was to get on the A HONOR ROLL.....

Drum roll please.....

Despite having the creeping crud that Mark, Jag and I had.....Rachel overcame the obstacle and got STRAIGHT A's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( ok, one A minus but who's counting!! ).

We told her ( BEFORE we knew the grades ) that we wanted to take her out to celebrate this weekend because we wanted to reward her effort. Whooooooooohoooooooooooooooo!!

Obviously, the child takes after me :)

No comments Laura please.....

I DO NOT HAVE A FLESH EATING DISEASE

2008-03-05T11:03:00.005-06:00

0_0

I really AM Lucy - I get that now and I EMBRACE it....I truly do.

That said...yesterday was the first day I felt sorta well again. So, I decided to make a nice dinner of ( turn away Mitty ) Kung Pao Chicken. As I made it, I went to open the HOISEN sauce....there was still a piece of that protective plastic thingie stuff on it and I somehow punctured my finger on it. It didn't bleed, so I sort of spaced it off ....then Lab called and I got yakking with her ( she is a riot btw ).

I get off the phone and go finish dinner.....and by now, my flipping finger is really hurting. So I slap a bandaid on it; one of those with the antibiotic stuff already on it.

3 hours later, my arm is throbbing 0_0 So, I did what any sane person would do and I went to bed.

I wake up and my hand is throbbing and my finger is swollen. I stumble to the bathroom and notice I have several red streaks from my hand all the way up my arm. NEAT! I have no immunity left in my body so now a flesh eating disease has gotten me!! ( Gwen says rectal bleeding is next for me - DTM ).

I call in sick to work -- because if you have a flesh eating disease and you are about to lose a hand...you don't want to be at work. I'm thinking it might traumatize a kid to have a finger fall in their goldfish crackers.

I go to the ER and a 10 yr old doctor examines my finger ( I did say " perhaps I've been watching too much HOUSE??" Naturally, he watches HOUSE and loves the show which led to a discussion on THAT ).....anyhoo.....turns out that I am allergic to the medicine on the banaid. SIGH.

Drama averted....sorta!! I shall keep my hand for yet another day!!

SNOT HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!!

2008-03-04T21:21:00.004-06:00

Oh... can it be?? Can I FINALLY be feeling better? Today was thee first day I felt like I might LIVE!!! My voice is sorta/semi back to normal ( Gee and Lab might not think so ) and I'm only hacking up half a lung instead of a whole one..... I can breathe out of one and half nostrils now....things are looking up!!

Who can I lip lock????

SMOOOOOOOOOOCH!!

Ok...who wants to dance with me?? Shake your buns people!! I am finally well and ready to dance again!!!!!!!!! Oh the disco era.... gotta love it!

Kyrie Eleison....

2008-02-29T10:44:00.005-06:00

"Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night"

I love Mr. Mister's version of Kyrie Eleison. Since it IS Lent, we ( St. Joe's ) are singing our version of it during Mass. We sing it in Greek and it moves me everytime. There's something about all of us knowing how to do it, without being told what to do, that's comforting to me. Hard to explain. Sort of like we all know what to do during the National Anthem.

Some days, you just have to look up at the sky and say "Kyrie Eleison, Christe Eleison" ( literally, Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy ).

Just smile and nod at me people. My head is full of snot.

0_0

What the Monkey????? Can't leave comments??

2008-02-27T06:59:00.006-06:00

It has come to my attention...ahhem...that some of you have tried to leave comments but been unsuccessful. I do apologize for this HORRIFIC problem but I'm unsure what to do about it. Kahlik, please write a letter to someone to get this problem resolved!!!

As for other issues:

1. Mark - he had a fabulous visit last Friday night and Jag and I were successful in getting about 2 inches of his hair cut off ( oh yes mon...he was looking like a Van Halen band member ). It's clear to us that all the positive ( ok...it's clear to ME ) thoughts and energy coming his way DO help.

2. Gwen - she hit sort of a low spot yesterday and I could tell she was close to tearing up ( that's huge for someone in Jag's family - in my family, we bawl at Hallmark card commercials and call it bonding ) -- she has only had one interview in February and has heard nothing. I feel badly for her but all I can do is offer support and pray for her.

3. Jenna - her fish continue to die at an alarming rate. This led her to her lobbying for a dog ( unsuccessfully ) with her Dad -- he said no but he did laugh at her smart use of an opportune moment.

4. Rachel - she's up for the Britney Spears mood swing award of the year. She's a great kid but tends to be a tad dramatic. I have NO idea where she got that.

5. ME - I caught an illness from the Mormon which leaves me with a hacking cough, snotty nose and a penchant for cleaning. Who says I'm not a loyal friend?? And no...no Bin Laden found yet in any closet but I am optimistic!!

6. Jag - still cute and still anal. What's not to love?

Have a great day peeps and I hope I fixed the comment thingie.

Hallelujah!! It's About Time!! Genuflecting

2008-02-23T18:54:00.008-06:00

I went to mass tonight and it was "run" by the 9th graders. Rachel had a pre-confirmation retreat all day at church and it ended by parents attending mass with their kids.

During the portion of the mass where petitions are read ( special intentions where we ask our fellow parishioners to pray for and give special intention to ) the lector read " We pray that we all will respect one another regardless of our religion, race, gender or .....sexual orientation" . I looked around to see if anyone reacted to this bold statement in the petition -- could this be?? Could the church be moving forward?? I quickly realized that those darling 9th graders had written the petitions!! Another one read " Let us pray that we all will respect one another regardless of our political affiliations or beliefs"

After mass, I caught Father Tom and said " Did the 9th graders write the petitions?" He looked at me cautiously and said " Ummm yes they did " and I said " well all right Father!! It's about time I heard something like that in a Catholic Church -- I'm proud of those kids!!" ....and his reaction?? Well...I'm not sure how to take this but he....laughed his arse off. And I left with " I guess you know where I stand on the issue " ...Come to think of it, he often laughs at me whenever we have a "discussion"...in a good way, I think.

0_0

Blessings on those darling 9th graders!!

Halle*flocking*lujah!!

Some days you just can't win

2008-02-22T09:17:00.005-06:00

As many of you know, Jag's younger sister has been living with us since October. Overall, it's gone pretty well. Gwen ( or "Gail" as Kahlik refers to her ) is easy to have around and we share many of the same interests.

She has been actively looking for a job since she got here and has had NO luck ( for those inclined toward prayer, please add her to your list ). Throughout this process, there have been many days she has struck me as "depressed"...therefore when she wanted me to watch LOST with her...I did so ( she owns all 3 seasons ). Seems harmless right?? Well...this ticked off Rachel to no end. Rachel has always been a fairly territorial child and really would love it if I just devoted all my time and attention to her ( and if I did that...she would really hate it and then ask if Jag and I were going to divorce since I was spending so much time with her 0_0 )....

In other words, Rachel is the child I can't win with. I'm either hovering too much and TOO interested in what she's doing and who with....or...I am ignoring her and spending too much time with Gwen. *Keep in mind that when Gwen wanted me to watch LOST, we invited Rachel to do so too and she watched half of the first episode UNTIL the phone rang and she had to gab with her friend for an hour. We repeatedly invited her to join us etc

Last night...Rachel was mad that I had privately told her she had been insensitve to Gwen. I finally lost it a bit and said ( in front of Gwen no less ) " Listen... I want you to be respectful and kind to all adults and I'll call you on that behavior EVERY time no matter who it's directed towards....it just so happens that Gwen is one of those adults that LIVES with us "

So my friends....my oldest child is jealous of any attention I give Gwen.

Any advice???

I hate the song JACK AND DIANE

2008-02-21T11:09:00.003-06:00

Several years ago, I rented a house with a few of my friends. One Sunday afternoon, we thought it would be a good idea to go down to one of the local bars and buy a case of beer for 5 bucks ( think CHEAP beer here ). The impulsiveness of youth can be a good thing....or a bad thing.

For some reason, this particular bar ( that used smelly socks in it's air vent. system ) also sold popular albums ( that's right, I said ALBUMS...no CD's in those days mon ) for dirt cheap. Ditty Diane sees the John Mellancamp one for 5 bucks and decides she must have it then and there.

We go home...drink a few beers and...then it happens. Ditty Diane decides that she LOVES ( and I mean LOVES ) the song Jack and Diane and thus makes us listen to it over...and over...and over....pee some,drink more...listen to it more....then get up on the heating pipes ( what the monkey do you call those? ) and PRETEND your a nightclub singer.

It was ugleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee my friends. Ugly.

To this day, I hate that song but whenever I hear it ( without fail! ) I think of Ditty Diane.

Houston, we DON'T have lift off

2008-02-20T21:38:00.002-06:00

Kev ( Group Home ) just called.... Mark's surgery has to be rescheduled because he has a fever and some lung congestion. On an up note...Kev said Mark has been having a FABULOUS week and he didn't have one SIB ( self injurous behavior ) today even though he had to wait 2 hours at the doctor's office.

Prayers help!!

The Fireworks Are Cancelled

2008-02-20T13:13:00.006-06:00

An email from an OLD ( emphasis on OLD ) friend reminded me of the days of my misspent youth... chasing elusive love and drinking way too much beer. Anyway.... this one particular friend had a bit too much to drink one night. It happened to be July 4th and as we drove down Lincoln Way, in Ames, she got on the P.A. system of my old Malibu ( don't ask why it was in there to begin with .....and PLEASE don't ask what happens when you are drunk, in a drive in movie theater, with access to one ....) and she loudly announced, as we sped down the road, "THE FIREWORKS ARE CANCELLED!! THE FIREWORKS ARE CANCELLED!! "

I now visit this friend anytime I can in prison and send her care packages :)

The Empath

2008-02-19T14:35:00.006-06:00

Anyone remember the old Star Trek show?? There was an episode once called THE EMPATH (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Empathm ) . Basically, it was about this woman that felt any emotion of those she was close to. If someone was scared, she felt it too etc. That's sort of how I feel about my friends. When they hurt, I hurt too...when they're scared, I'm scared too. When they cry, I tear up too and blow my nose.

I hope I am always sensitive and respectful to my friends when they are in pain or going through a rough time. Because of my experience with Mark and grief, I hope I have learned what NOT to say...such as:

1. It could be worse
2. God doesn't give you more than you can handle
3. At least your other kids are normal.

Etc, etc, etc.

Folks, everyone has the right to feel like shat now and then and feel like they got a raw deal. Most of the folks I know and love rarely allow themselves to do this because they strive so dang hard to be strong and hold it together and they don't want to abuse the "self sorrow" card. I'm here to tell you that it's ok now and then to have that feeling. I know I have had days where I thought " who the flock did I piss off in the universe" ....we have the right to feel sorry for ourselves now and then. How else can we effectively give sympathy to others if we don't show the same kindness to ourselves now and then??

I love my friends and I say a silent prayer for them daily. Blessed am I for knowing them and receiving the abundance of their love and support and even more blessed am I should I return it.

~~~~~~~~~~

XXOXX

You can never really exhale

2008-02-19T08:47:00.003-06:00

We got a letter from our county social services saying we need to be at a meeting on the 12th of March to discuss:

1. Your child's continuing need for placement
2. Progress made towards goals outlined in the case plan
3. A date by which YOUR CHILD MAY BE RETURNED HOME
4. Or by which other placement plans may be made.

What the flock? This is a new one for us. We've never had to do this in the nearly 4.5 years he's been placed.

Naturally, I have a call into them.....waiting to hear back.

Hand me some nyquil....

I Predict Mama Will Say "SHUT UP!"

2008-02-15T09:26:00.005-06:00

So....I'm at the 3rd grade Valentine's Day Party when one of the Mom's ( She happens to be one of Jenna's Brownie Leaders as well ) says to me "Oh there's Michelle...her Mom is 6 months pregnant". Okayyyyyyyyyy that's nice I'm thinking ...but I can tell there's something more coming and...there was. She says "Angela ( Michelle's Mom ) is a surrogate" 0_0

So I said " You mean like "Uterus for Rent"?" Ummm yes. A couple from California have made a contract with Angela.

Think of all the ethical ramifications here. On the one hand, if I had a close family member or friend, I MIGHT consider doing surrogacy for someone ( I don't even know how to spell it! ). On the other hand, would you consider doing it for money???

Discuss 0_0

Happy Valentine's Day!!

2008-02-14T09:27:00.003-06:00

I love Valentine's Day - what's not to like? It's a day devoted to love :) You can EVEN love your 9 year old when you find out they swiped some of the candy hearts you had counted out for the 6 sections of 3rd graders ( 625 per room to play Bingo to be exact but who's counting?? 0_0 ). Oh and did you know, you can't find ANY candy hearts the day of a party?? It's true!! I bet you didn't know that. I can only hope some folks ( besides the JW kids ) are absent today.

*weep*

Just try and not...

2008-02-13T14:45:00.003-06:00

....move your feet and butt to Rosemary Clooney!! I was shaking my butt around the kitchen just now as it played. Wiggling and grooving!! Come on, Come on over to my housssssssssssssssssssssse I'm gonna give you cannnnnnnnnnnnnnndee!! Come on, come on over to my house!! Makes you want to jump a Mr. Goodbar or an O'Henry doesn't it!!

p.s. A good song to make out with your honey with...scroll my player down to Etta James' AT LAST

Enjoy!

A New Guilty Pleasure

2008-02-12T19:49:00.000-06:00

My number keeps going up and here is yet ANOTHER guilty pleasure I have discovered. On BRAVO, Millionaire Matchmaker. I'm telling you... it's like a trainwreck you can't help but watch.

My guilty pleasure list:

1. House - I give it 5 Hail Mary's out of a possible 5 on the penance scale.

2. Lost - 5 Hail Mary's

3. Boston Legal - 5 Hail Mary's

4. The Tudors - 4 Hail Mary's

5. Millionaire Matchmaker - 3.75 Hail Mary's

The Man Is Full Of Surprises....

2008-02-11T09:20:00.000-06:00

Jag comes to me last night and says "Ok, ummm I have reservations at a restaurant on Thursday night and you need to be ready by 6:00. All I can tell you is that it is 15 minutes away" 0_0 Me says " What do I wear? " He responds " Not jeans " . I am very surprised by this...pleasantly so!!

You put your right foot in....

2008-02-09T13:14:00.000-06:00

Ahhhhhhhhhh the Hokey Pokey - Freud would have a field day with that title. For me....it makes me think of wedding dances or Kahlik; and not specifically in that order.

Mark had a great home visit. He only slapped himself once last night and once this am. HUGE difference from last week. He did bite a child at school yesterday but my mother says the child obviously provoked Mark 0_0. I talked to one of the surgeons yesterday and we are going to up his ibuprofen and taper him off the tylenol 3. After his surgery on the 21st...he will get vicoden. Gwen says he can be a "little HOUSE" then ( see HOUSE show for more information ).

Now...let's get back to the Hokey Pokey....wiggle your feet folks!!

Come on now....sway to the music...

2008-02-05T09:01:00.001-06:00

You know you want to. Commmmmmmmmmmmmmmme onnnnnnnnn!! Tap your feet and sway your butt to the music.....

Life Marches On

2008-02-04T09:43:00.000-06:00

Isn't it amazing what a difference a day or 2 can make?? It gives us more perspective and allows us to lick our " wounds " and regroup. Either that...or I'm bipolar 0_0

I'll Admit It, I'm Bummed Today

2008-02-02T19:12:00.000-06:00

I'm trying to stay positive and not take things that happen personally but I am in a bad place today. My arm hurts; I had to pop some ibprofen today for it.... but really my feelings hurt more. I feel like bawling :( All I tried to do was help Mark feel better and he turned on me and bit me. The shocking thing for me is that as he bit me I thought " ok, here we go again...this hurts but it won't kill me ". Luckily, Jag was there and pulled him off of me. He had a rough night until he went to bed.....then...he got up and was fine this morning. I'm so confused... is this all pain?? Is this behavioral?? Or, as Jag thinks, a combo of both?? We've had such a good run this past year that I guess I got sucked into thinking all the bad times were behind us ( I know! I know! Stupid of me!! ).

I'm feeling sorry for myself today and I'll be ashamed about that later but for now...BOO HOO FOR FLOCKING ME!!!

Bite Me - Literally!

2008-02-01T18:34:00.000-06:00

Tonight, I got bit by Mark. Not even sure what provoked it. It happened right after he'd slapped himself (and I had given him ice for his face). We counted to 10 like we always do and BAM! He grabbed my arm ( it was like slow motion ) and dug into my arm. The GOOD thing about living in Siberia is that you wear several layers of clothing; therefore, he did not break the skin on the arm. The reality of autism just hits me sometimes....

I get tired of explaining

2008-01-30T14:16:00.000-06:00

*Sigh* Mark's dental surgery is tentatively scheduled for Feb 21st - however, the receptionist on the phone made it real clear to me that "his wisdom teeth SHOULDN'T be bothering him and giving him that much pain" *HUGE SIGH* I responded " Have you lived with someone with autism or have either of the surgeons??" Of course NOT. I then added " I know it sounds crazy to people that don't live like we do but I've seen Mark get a second degree burn on his feet and sleep like a baby but then turn around and freak out over a hangnail. He is slapping his face and digging in the back of his mouth; If you have a better suggestion, I'm all ears" I AM SO FLOCKING TIRED OF HAVING TO EXPLAIN shat to people about autism. I AM SO FLOCKING TIRED of having to defend my child and help him get a smidge of relief. Sorry to vent but it's just so doggone frustrating to not be heard. Can you imagine how Mark feels?

Someone Get Al Gore On The Phone!

2008-01-30T07:29:00.000-06:00

It's 40 below windchill out there today!! I just gave Rachel and the neighbor girl a ride to school and told them to call me at the end of the day with the instructions " DO NOT GO WALKING OUTSIDE AT ALL TODAY !!". I truly wonder how many moms will bring there little ones into work today....we shall see.

Oh ...and it's Girl Scout cookie time so you know how much fun I'm having with that.....0_0